The Cynic Says……

OMFG. That girl is just plain fuckin hot… The pics on her front page do NOT do her justice. Go to the free ones and then use the drop down list to look through her other pics. Mother of jesus she is hot. Seriously, if I was dating a girl, I’d still fuck that girl… wouldn’t matter who I was dating or whatever, because you only live once, and realistically it’s a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to nail a girl that hot. Thing is, I’d actually tell my girlfriend beforehand that I was going to do it. Perhaps she’d understand that it’s only a one time thing, just sex, and no feelings involved… Hate to say it, but there are other girls out there and I can’t really see myself being in love with someone so much that I’d pass up the chance at something like that. She could threaten to break up all she wanted, but I’d still do it without hesitating. I’d never cheat on a girl, though (no, that’s not a contradiction). Telling the person beforehand makes it not cheating, if you ask me… that’s more like swinging than cheating. Cheating would be doing it behind the person’s back. I wouldn’t get pissed if a girl I was dating sucked another dude’s dick without telling me beforehand (it’s hard to plan things like that)… unless she started making a habit out of it. Then I’d be a little annoyed. And if I was dating a girl, she could eat all the pussy she wanted and I wouldn’t care. Simple as that. Oh well… enough on that subject. I found out I have Sunday off, but then I work all fucking week (Mon-Fri) and then get Saturday off (which probably means I’ll have all next weekend off again, as I’ve only worked 1 Sunday). My work schedule is so unbelievably fucked up. I was hoping to have at least a somewhat sane schedule, but that doesn’t seem to be the case. *sigh* such is life, I suppose. We’re having a Halloween party tomorrow night, which should be lots of fun. I have to work at 11am Saturday, which should NOT be lots of fun. I WILL be hungover like a motherfucker… I will feel like shit… I also get off at 8pm, so I’ll have plenty of time to sleep before I start drinking again when I go to Joes on Sunday night. This weekend is going to be interesting, to say the least. I won’t be dressing up for Halloween, just because I’m not the kinda person that likes dressing up for Halloween, nor do I care about Halloween. I’ll just be getting drunk as fucking shit and going to work on Saturday with a hangover. fun fun. I’m going through www.webtender.com looking at drinks I can make with the ingredients I either have or am planning to buy. One of the ones that is not on the site but I saw in this drink book at the liquor store is called a “German Leg Spreader” and has chocolate liqueur, Jagermeister, and Ice 101. That one should be interesting as hell, and I intend on trying it for sure. I’ve developed quite the love for Jager lately… Last Sunday, everything I drank had Jager in it. Jager tastes like fucking SHIT straight, but awesome when mixed. If only it was 100 proof or higher, that would rock nuts. I have a fifth of Jager sitting in the freezer just waiting to be killed. I’ll make sure it happens. That’s all for now… possibly more to come later… though I doubt it. I have to get my check at like 11am tomorrow so I can eat at work tomorrow.

hot damn… I got a fucking haircut… it looks SOOOOOOO much better, and feels about 50,000 times better to boot. It actually looks better this time around than it normally does when I get it cut short. I dunno what she did, but it just looks a lot better than usual. I think the chick’s just good like that. I have to go into work tomorrow @1pm as usual. Hopefully the girl I mentioned previously will be around… I’ve informed the trainer about her (he and I have become good friends), so MAYBE if they get to shadow with anyone, he’ll put her with me. I wouldn’t get so lucky, of course… I don’t think I’d be able to concentrate anyway… Everytime I get around her, I get this funky feeling in my stomach and tend to stumble over my words a lot. :-\ kinda sucks, but I managed to keep it in check when I worked with her. Still, though… good god the things I would do to this girl. Frankly, I don’t think I stand a chance in hell with her… even though we have all kinds of stuff in common AND she digs skinny guys (she told me herself and I’ve heard her mention it to a co-worker). I mean, as far as the other girl I’d been talking to goes, as much as I’d like it to work out, I’m kinda losing hope to be honest. It’s not a matter of me not liking her anymore or anything… it’s just a matter of me being realistic. I’m the opposite of what she normally dates, both physically and psychologically. She even told me herself that I’m not the kind of guy she’d normally date. Plus, when talking to her friend I mentioned that as soon as the girl in question came across a hot guy that would give her the time of day, I’d be kicked to the curb… her resonse: “Probably so”. This leads me to believe that the two have discussed it, however the girl in question doesn’t seem to think that I’m capable of handling the fact that she’s really not interested in me. Either that or she doesn’t want to give up the guaranteed multiple orgasms just yet (can’t blame her there). But hell, if that’s all she wants, all she has to say is “I don’t wanna date you, but you can go down on me all you want”. Very simple and it wouldn’t bother me one bit, to be perfectly honest. Oh, well… I can’t really say I’m worried about it at this point. I’m just gonna let her come to me and decide what she wants from me (if anything). I’d be lying if I said I didn’t like her… and her kids (well, I’ve only met one) are incredibly cool. I don’t much care for kids, but I can deal with kids over 4 or 5 yrs old… It’s babies that I don’t care for. They’re cute as hell, but just too much work. Needless to say, I’m not even gonna bother trying anything with anyone else until I get the official blow-off from this one. Oddly enough, I just realized that I’ve more or less re-hashed my last post. How fucking lame. I guess it’s just the one thing that’s been running through my mind a bit lately. On a lighter note, my day has been rather enjoyable… I got my haircut of courrse, went to the mall and ate and walked around and shit… got to sleep in late today since I didn’t work… saw tons of hot ass girls at the mall. Found some more stuff I want for my computer at CompUSA & Best Buy. Speakers being #1 as I’m using Kent’s old shitty speakers, only one of which works. I should go play some unreal tournament or something. I’m feeling very hyper and there’s nothing better to do. On that note, I’m off… possibly to play some video games.

I’m drunk as shit :)… fun fun… anyway, as much as I look at other girls and go “damn she’s hot”, they still don’t really compel me to even so much as consider touching anyone but this one girl that I raved about in my last post. Honestly, I’d be shocked if this goes anywhere beyond where were are now because I don’t see any way possible that I’m even close enough to being good enough for her. I’m the exact opposite of everything she’s ever looked for in a guy. I’m good to her, skinny, not terribly attractive, intelligent, caring, and just plain honest. Most of the guys she goes for are actually attractive, stocky, assholes, and can’t really carry on much of a convo. I dunno what she wants from me, but I’m not gonna question things right now. When a girl you’ve been attracted to forever finally gives you the time of day, you don’t question it.. .simple as that. She made the comment that she’s “content” and won’t be “looking for anyone else”, but me being me, I don’t really trust anyone so I’m not gonna go getting attatched anytime soon. Needless to say, I had fun tonight… I saw a somewhat friend of mine that I haven’t seen in forever; it was kinda cool talking to him, but he gets annoying after awhile. I met Nay Nay’s cousin tonight… she’s ok looking, but needs some personality adjustment. I know I’m ugly, but it’s still disrespectful to not look at me a single time during a conversation, if you ask me. I understand that she’s in the navy.. woo woo… normally military people look people in the eyes when they speak. She just kinda looked over my shoulder like I wasn’t even there.. I guess if nothing else I found it more amusing than insulting. It’s not like she was all that or anything. I could see if she was gorgeous beyond any guy’s wildest dreams… she was ok at best. big fucking deal. Bleh… I have to work at 1pm tomorrow… not that I’m looking forward to it or anything.. I’m off Tues and then I work Wed-Sat… maybe I’m off Sunday; who knows. I’ll know on Wednesday or something like that. Oh, well… hopefully my Tuesday off won’t be TOO boring. I’m too drunk to post any more bullshit… too much going through my brani right now and none of which I can make any coherent thoughts out of… Oh, well.. time for bed

HOLY SHIT I’M UPDATING MY FUCKING BLOG!
*ahem*
now… with that outta the way… I’ve not really bothered to update much lately because what little shit has been going on either is of nobody’s concern but my own… or not worth posting (sometimes both). Currently, I’m sitting here on a Friday night listening to DJ X-Ray Ted on www.di.fm. He’s quite the amazing DJ, to be honest… His mixing skills are incredible and I love his track selection. Perfect mix of vocal stuff and harder stuff. Anyway, enough about music… suffice it to say I’m in love with di.fm’s DJ Mixes channel. It rocks my fuckin nuts off! lol… at any rate, moving on. I have gas like a motherfucker, to start with. I think it’s the General Tsao’s I ate. I told the dude at Dynasty to make it super spicy hot, so uch so that I’ll cry/sweat/scream. Boy did they ever! I shoulda known I was in for it when the guy said “oh yeah, I’ll burn your asshole”. I took 2 bites out of the first piece and was sweating. I couldn’t even finish it all because I wasn’t anywhere near as hungry as I thought at first. It was good, but just ungodly hot; plus they gave me more than I’m used to getting. Oh, well… it was good as hell, just that I won’t order it THAT spicy again. Unfortunately, nothing all that interesting has happened lately aside from getting a girl off 3 times (and subsequently 7 times the next time around) who’d never had anyone get her off more than twice… and hadn’t had anyone get her off since 2000. That was needless to say, very cool. Also, as usual, I got shitfaced/hammered/smashed this past Sunday and went to work with no hangover on Monday. This time I drank 4 Nazi Cokes and 1 Midori Sour, plus I did have a Nazi Coke before I left the house. I was pretty fucking hammered, to say the least. I bought this redheaded chick named Rachael 2 drinks, plus I bought Phil one as well. I was in quite the benevolent mood last week. I don’t forsee that happening again this week. I’m such a damn dork, though… I buy a chick 2 drinks and don’t even TRY to get her number. Amusingly enough, it never even crossed my mind. I guess my mind is rather occupied by other things/people right now and getting some random redhead’s number is the furthest thing from my mind. She’s really cool to talk to and all and I figured I’d be nice and buy her a couple of drinks. I think most of it was just that I get REALLY nice when I’m drunk, so I end up spending money on my friends and such. Oh, well.. I’m sure they don’t mind. I’m sure I’ll be hammered this weekend, but I’m not buying anyone any drinks this time… the $15 I could save could be used for other things. I hate having to work on Mondays, though… I like to sleep all day after I get shitfaced. Unfortunately, I have to get up at noon and be at work at 1, which is fucking gay. Even more gay is that this week, I’m actually off on Tuesday, so I end up being off 2 days, working 1, and then off 1 more, then working 4 more. Retarded… that’s all I can say. Other than my fucked up schedule, I dig my job though. Oh, well.. that about wraps it up for this edition of “What the FUCK is Kevin thinking?”… Possibly more to come later.

Well, I don’t update anywhere near as often now, I suppose because nothing interesting has been happening lately. I don’t really feel like posting every stupid last little thought that runs through my brain on any given day, unfortunately. As of right now, I just got back from CEJ and I’m simply drunk as fuck. I’ve had a good weekend overall to be honest. I have to work at 1pm tomorrow, and I hope I’m not too horribly hung over. Last week, I got blistered and didn’t get hung over, which was nice. Maybe this week will be the same. I ended up going with Jess and her brother Josh, who was cool as shit and kept me amused for a good portion of the night. He’s actually a Chad Pennington fan like myself… and we both agree that Barry Sanders is one of the greatest players in the history of the NFL. Jess was in a pissy mood tonight. Hopefully whatever it was that had her so bent outta shape will clear up by tomorrow because she’s one of the few that’s more or less always been nice to me. She jumped down my throat tonight, but I understand that she was in a bad mood and I didn’t take it to heart or anything. There was this terribly cute girl I met tonight named Marissa… I’ll forget her name by the next time I see her, but she was part Native American and there was just something about her that made me wanna slam her up against the wall, drop to my knees and eat her til she collapsed. Umm, yeah, anyway… enough about that. I had 5 nazi cokes tonight… yummy… Oddly enough, when I drink it at home, I end up getting sick. I don’t get it. Maybe it has something to do with fountain coke vs bottled coke? That’s the only thing I can think of. I love alcohol, just not the sickness or the hangovers. Right now, It’d be pretty cool to just have someone to go cuddle up and go to sleep with. I’m not THAT tired, but it’d just be nice. Honestly, I had that Friday night and even though I didn’t sleep worth a shit, it was still nice. Too bad it won’t ever be a permanent thing and (from what I can tell) I’ll be lucky if it ever happens again. Oh, well… I can’t say I want that damn much from a girl… but I’ll never stoop to the level of settling for someone I don’t think will make me completely happy. I’m picky, what can I say. Unfortunately, most women can’t seem to keep me interested for longer than a week. Yeah, that’s partially my problem, but it’s still their fault, too… I can’t help that most of them aren’t all that intelligent or speak atrocious English. Yes, I’m picky about things like that.. but I can’t help it. Ugh… anyway, enough blabbering, I should probably try and sleep or something..