The Cynic Says……

I’m on my way to bed, but thought I’d drop an update… Nothing major happened, outside of going out last night and getting completely fucking shitfaced out of my mind. In doing so, I found that the waitress we had last night (Natalie) was roommates with one of our other favorite waitresses there (Nikki). They look enough alike to pass as sisters, and they’re both cute as FUCK. Natalie has the nicer ass and Nikki has the nicer face. Nikki’s like 22 and Natalie’s 25, I think. I ended up tipping her like $11, which is an absurd amount on a $27 tab, but she was worth it. She’s the only waitress we’ve had that got us drinks wicked quick. Quick as in less than 5 minute wait for a drink, which is really good on a busy Friday night. I’m so much more brave and social when I’m drunk. I talked to both of them quite a bit and didn’t even really think twice about it. I never stopped to think “hey, these girls probably think I’m a fucking dork and don’t care to talk to me”. I remember telling them both that Nikki had prettier eyes and Natalie had the bigger butt. It was rather interesting to say the least. I had quite a bit of fun… up until I woke up this morning and puked (more like dry heaved) my guts out. There was nothing in my stomach to really puke up, so outside of some undigested cranberry juice, it was dry… and goddamn those are painful. I know better than to drink on an empty stomach, but for some reason I did it anyway. Guess I got what I deserved. Puking is not fun. You’ll never see it listed under my hobbies… nor will you see it an an olympic sport anytime soon. Though, admittedly, that might be interesting. Pairs artistic vomiting anyone? Um, yeah… anyway, that’s pretty disgusting. I’m going to bed.